Blue

“You will never be completely home again.  Because part of your heart will always be elsewhere. That’s the price you pay for the richness of loving or knowing someone in more than one place”

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52 weeks

September: Inspiration

10:06pm and can’t help but feel inspired again.

“Great things are coming when everything seems to be going wrong. Old energy is clearing out for new energy to enter. Be patient”

And this is true. Late August to September where I thought I was going downhill turned out to be another blessing in disguise. Seeing all these signs helps me be in tuned with my spirit and most of all my heart. Becoming filled with so much happiness has absolutely helped heal every part of myself.

“It’s not what you look at that matters, it’s what you see” — Thoreau

Since discovering the power of my thoughts, my life hasn’t been the same. Like everyone else I use to think my reality was out of control, pre-destined when in truth I was ultimately creating my destiny through my own thoughts. Taking the time to study my mind, my habits, moral compass and the kind of thoughts I was entertaining rewarded me with the greatest discovery that I have to offer for myself, to others and for the world.

I’ve been putting my energy into the right places keeping myself centered better than I had anticipated. I am in no rush to reaching my destined goal but as of now I can’t help but feel this adrenaline by the choices and experiences I made to live out by.  This, I find really beautiful. Finding the many ways to be in love again.

– Em.

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blue.

Blocked love 

I understand why blocking would be the immediate mechanism in attempt to forget the past. And especially in an age where social media projects such vast stories, ‘deleting’ is portrayed as the best resolution.  
However, learning from my own experiences this is the wrong way to heal. Yes everyone lives out their lives differently and what people say or present on the exterior can only say so much. But I believe a person’s self love is far more potent and beautiful to posses when it comes to healing.
My faith lies heavily in the belief that in order to grow we need to embrace previous happenings preceding into our now existing lives. To block the past (to me) is heavy indication of being shameful, unforgiving — those of which I am not. 

I am not ashamed for falling in love with someone who stopped ‘loving’ me. 

I am not ashamed that I hung on after he stopped putting in half the effort.

I am not ashamed that I didn’t realize sooner that I should have let go.

The only shame here is putting good, real love to waste. 

I forgive myself & I forgive him

I get it, I fell in love with a person who I thought was deserving of my time. And discovering this, I learned that I’ve become this inspirational being wondering what else I’ve been hiding. 

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